Labels

The best advice I ever received as a 20something establishing a foothold in my career is from my 4th aunt.  I had received a not-stellar performance appraisal in my first year... and was moping about it.  4th aunt told me that labels are like Post-Its, if you like them, keep them around longer to remind you... and if you do not like them, why, just throw them away!
I learnt this lesson only as an adult.

I am thinking about this lesson in the context of the Singapore education system.
9 year olds take a national exam to determine if they are "Gifted", and hence to be put into special classes where they spend LESS time on the curriculum (the assumption is that these very smart children already have it down pat) and more time exploring outside the curriculum.

"Gifted" and Not-"Gifted" is a label bestowed onto the child at NINE years old.  Resources are then allocated disproportionately more to the Gifted.  Teachers with advanced degrees and diplomas.  Smaller class sizes.  More spruced up school facilities....

Nine years old.  I only have 4 more years to protect Medium Boy's childhood.  Sigh.

New Skills

Work has consumed my life, so much that 80% of my waking hours is spent on work.  The only comfort is that a small portion of that 80% is still spent at home where I am physically with the boys.

This week,  Medium Boy has learnt how to blow up a balloon by himself, and blend sounds together to form words.    I am extraordinarily proud of his phonetic ability… so proud that wow, when he eventually learns to read, I might throw a party!  Heh.

Small Boy scores high on mimicry.  He went to the bowling alley once in May, and since then, has been imitating the bowler’s posture when playing with his toy bowling set.  Well, he thinks he is correctly imitating…. What he actually does is to raise his buttocks, then lift a leg up, and his head is down looking backwards at his other leg.  Obviously he cannot see in front… so I tried to correct him, but he was adamant in telling me that he can do it himself, thank you very much.  Yesterday, I caught him sneaking a peek in front before he let go of his toy bowling ball.  Haha.

The mimicry goes so far as he instructing me to put my thumb, third and fourth finger properly into his toy bowling ball, the “correct” finger position, when I bowl with him.  *grin  

Pssst.... I cannot keep a secret yet....

At nearly 5, Medium Boy is absolutely full of surprises.  He has no filters, no censorship, whatever he thinks... he says aloud.  I love this age!

Act 1, Scene 1
In the car.  On the way to school this morning.  Medium Boy announces he has a secret.  On my probing regarding what it was, he said smugly, tis a secret Mama, I am not telling you, teeheehee.

Act 1, Scene 2
The Husband and I chat about our upcoming day.  We are not delibrately ignoring Medium Boy.

Act 2, Scene 1
Medium Boy pipes up "When you go to sleep, I will tip toe quietly to the fridge, take away all the sweets and EAT all of them!"

Oh, his nefarious plan has been revealed!  Grin.
The Mama will take pre-emptive measures now to clear out the sweets.  He has been coughing on and off at night for the past 3 weeks. 

Energy is renewable, not Time

I recently received a HBR article titled “Manage Your Energy, not your Time”.  The authors opine that longer days at the office do not work because time is a limited resource, however personal energy is renewable. There are 4 dimensions of personal energy that the authors recommend we notice… physical, emotional , mental and spiritual.  The tips for rejuvenating physically are

• Enhance sleep by setting an earlier bedtime and reducing alcohol use…. I do not drink alcohol regularly so that’s a plus for me.  Bedtimes are determined by the boys… I am thinking seriously about putting them in their own room now.  But but but some part of me wants them close!  I spend many hours away from them in the day, night time togetherness is to make up for it…
• Reduce stress by engaging in cardiovascular activity at least 3 times a week and strength training at least once…. THREE times a week!?  If running after the boys counts, then I have cardio everyday.  Haha.  Not enough to get my heart rate up to 70% of maximum though.  Never mind strength training.  The heaviest things I haul around are my boys.  Oh and weekly grocery shopping.  I walk back from the supermarket.
• Eat small meals and light snacks every 3 hours…. YES, a tick for me in this area.
• Learn to notice signs of imminent energy flagging, including restlessness, yawning, hunger and difficulty concentrating…. Yep, I notice… Too often ignore these signs though.
• Take brief but regular breaks, away from the desk, at 90-to 120-minute intervals throughout the day.

Things are heating up at work with the business plan 2014 kicking off this week.  I turn to brewing this yummy confinement tea.  I use a Thermos Shuttle Chef 1.5L to prepare and drink one cup in the morning, sipping throughout the day.

To boost blood circulation – 3-4 pieces of bei qi (astralagus) and a handful of black beans.

Sweet tasting herbs – 12-15 red dates, a pinch of wolfberries, a bigger pinch of dried longan, 3-4 pieces of finger-sized dang shen (a type of ginseng, I think).

Enjoy!

First day of school

We touched down from Malaysia on Sunday at 11am, rushed to unpack, put the boys down to nap at 230pm [they gave into fatigue only at 345pm], woke them up at 645pm for a family dinner…. And today is the first day of school after a month.

Medium Boy got up bright and early by himself as his diaper had leaked.

Small Boy woke up grudgingly. 

The Husband walked them up to the school entrance at 7.53am.  Small Boy cries and clings to me when I send them up.  It is a far gentler start to the day when the Husband sends them up.

Back to work after a week long holiday.  Taking a deep breath and plunging straight in.  Sure feels like the first day of school for me too.

OH!  Today is the first day of the second half of the year.  I haven’t even got my 2013 work deliverables agreed with my boss yet. 

Holidays bleah

Mommies like routine.  Ok this mommy likes Medium Boy and Small Boy to have a routine.  I really believe that little ones behave better when they know what to expect next.

Holidays are a time of relaxing the routine, hence it wrecks havoc with my own routine.

The Husband on the other hand thinks nothing of disrupting the routine to go off on adventures..... Swimming.  Beach combing.  Watching a centipede make its way across the pavement.  Aargh.  Drives me crazy. 

Things get even crazier when these adventurous activities eat into nap time.  For then, I have 2 half-sleepy boys on my hands who are prone to sudden bursts of energy in between their general lethargy.

I have put my foot down and insist that their adventures tomorrow are confined to the morning.  3 days without naps is messing up my own routine!  I miss the time to potter around the house, do my own things without having to act as a referee every 10 minutes, or thinking up activities to keep both Medium Boy and Small Boy occupied.

Having the other set of grandparents watching like hawks over our everyday activities (since when did my life become a soccer match for your commentary.....) is also not fun.

I miss Singapore, my own home, even though the weather is still hazy.

Reckon I am having an AARGH moment.
Breathe Celine breathe.....

Glad to escape the haze

The boys, the Husband and I are escaping from hazy Singapore tomorrow.  We had planned to visit the in laws in June, coinciding with the boys’ school holidays, not to run away from the haze.  I cannot wait to go.  I can only hope and pray that the wind direction does not blow the smog [let’s call a spade a spade, shall we? Haze sounds too benign for the smoke that gets into the building even when the windows are close] into Kuching too.